Herbert Burrows was one of Blavatsky's students, and when she died in 1891 he wrote the following text as a posthumous tribute to her; I added subtitles in green.
WHAT SHE IS TO ME
Two years ago Annie Besant and I saw H.P.B. for the first time, and now it is not many days since I stood by her lily-covered coffin and took my last lingering look at the personality of the marvellous woman who had revolutionised the lives of my colleague and myself. Two years are but little as men count time, but these two have been so pregnant with soullife that the old days before them seem ages away.
If it be true that life should be counted by epochs of the mind, then life, from the day that I first clasped H.P.B.’s hand to the moment when, majestic in her death sleep, I helped to wreathe around her body the palms from that far-off East which she loved so well, was richer, fuller, longer to me than a generation of the outward turmoil which has its little day and then is gone.
His first encounter with Blavatsky
I went to her a materialist, she left me a Theosophist, and between these two there is a great gulf fixed. Over that gulf she bridged the way. She was my spiritual mother, and never had child a more loving, a more patient, a more tender guide.
It was in the old Lansdowne Road days. Beset with problems of life and mind that our materialism could not solve, dwelling intellectually on what are now to us the inhospitable shores of agnosticism.
Annie Besant and I ever craved more light. We had read the Occult World, and in bye-gone years we had heard —who had not ?— of the strange woman whose life seemed to be a contradiction of our most cherished theories, but as yet the philosophy of the book was to us but assertion, the life of the woman a career which we had no means of examining.
Sceptical, critical, trained by long years of public controversy to demand the most rigid scientific proof of things which were outside our experience, Theosophy was to us an unknown, and, as it then seemed, an impossible land.
And yet it fascinated, for it promised much, and with talking, with reading, the fascination grew. With the fascination also grew the desire to know, and so, on an ever-to-be remembered evening, with a letter of introduction from Mr. W.T. Stead, then editor of the Pall Mall Gazette, as our passport, we found ourselves face to face, in the drawing room of 17, Lansdowne Road, with the woman whom we afterwards learned to know and to love as the most wonderful woman of her time.
I was not foolish enough to look for miracles, I did not expect to see Madame Blavatsky float, nor did I crave for materialised teacups, but I did want to hear about Theosophy, and I did not hear much.
She whom we were there to see was a stout, unwieldy lady, playing Russian “Patience”, and keeping up a stream of conversation on nearly every subject except the one which was just then nearest our minds.
No attempt at proselyting, no attempt to “fix” us, (we were not hypnotised !) but all tiie while the wonderful eyes were flashing light, and, in spite of the bodily infirmity which was even then painfully apparent, there was a reserve of power which gave the impression that we were seeing, not the real woman, but only the surface character of some one who had endured much, and who knew much.
I tried to keep an open impartial mind, and I believe I succeeded. I was genuinely anxious to learn, but I was critical and on the watch for the slightest attempt at hoodwinking.
When I afterwards discovered something of H.P.B.’s extraordinary insight, I was not surprised to find that she had gauged accurately and unerringly my mental attitude on this my first visit, and it is an attitude which she never really discouraged.
If those who talk so foolishly about her magnetising people could but know how she continually impressed upon us the absolute duty of proving all things and holding fast only to that which is good!
Herbert becomes Blavatsky's student and describes his teacher
To go once was to go again, and so it came that after a few visits I began to see light. I caught glimpses of a lofty morality, of a selfsacrificing zeal, of a coherent philosophy of life, of a clear and definite science of man and his relation to a spiritual universe. These it was which attracted me — not phenomena, for I saw none.
For the first time in my mental history I had found a teacher who could pick up the loose threads of my thought and satisfactorily weave them together, and the unerring skill, the vast knowledge, the loving patience of that teacher grew on me hour by hour.
Quickly I learned that the so-called charlatan and trickster was a noble soul, whose every day was spent in unselfish work, whose whole life was pure and simple as a child's, who counted never the cost of pain or toil if these could advance the great cause to which her every energy was consecrated.
Open as the day to a certain point, she was the incarnation of kindness — silent as the grave if need be, she was sternness personified at the least sign of faithlessness to the work which was her life.
Grateful, so grateful for every affectionate attention, careless, so careless of all that concerned herself, she bound us to her, not simply as wise teacher, but as loving friend.
Once I was broken down through long bodily and mental strain and the wheels of my life ran so heavily that they nearly stopped. Through it all her solicitude was untiring and one special proof of it that she gave, too personal to mention here, would have been thought of, perhaps, but by one in a million.
Perfect —no; faults— yes; the one thing she would hate most of all would be the indiscriminate praise of her personality. But when I have said that she was sometimes impetuous as a whirlwind, a very cyclone when she was really roused, I have told nearly all. And I have often thought it was more than possible that some of these outbursts were assumed for a special object. Lately they had almost vanished.
Her enemies sometimes said she was rough and rude. We who knew her, knew that a more unconventional woman, in the very realest sense of the word, never lived. Her absolute indifference to all outward forms was a true indifference based upon her inner spiritual knowledge of the verities of the universe.
Sitting by her when strangers came, as they did come from every corner of the earth, I have often watched with the keenest amusement their wonder at seeing a woman who always said what she thought.
Given a prince and she would probably shock him, given a poor man and he would have her last shilling and her kindliest word.
How meagre all this is I know full well. Of the real H.P.B. we only caught occasional glimpses, and so necessarily we are thrown back on that human side of her life which appeals most to the human in us. Of her vast and profound knowledge this is not the time to speak, and if it were, how could one speak?
Only its ripples ever reached us, but those would make an ordinary ocean. Probably we shall never know all the why and the wherefore of her recent incarnation.
In 1889 Annie Besant and I were with her in France at the Forest of Fontainebleau, and while there she went over with us in manuscript part of the Voice of the Silence. Looking back on that time, I remember that the passages over which she was most impressive were those which describe the toilsome ascent of the pilgrimsoul.
In the copy of the book which she gave me and which will never eave me, she has written, “To Herbert Burrows, my old friend in another and better incarnation, from his ever-loving H.P.B.”
It may be that in those words lie part of the key to the life that we knew.
Be that as it may, the real key for us is to be found in the example of her self-sacrificing devotion to her work. This is the note which was struck in the hearts of the hushed crowd who but yesterday gathered for the last time round the body of their loved teacher.
That body has vanished from our sight, but the work remains. No great thought can ever die, no great effort for humanity can ever cease, but thought and effort can be accelerated by faithful service for mankind.
More than ever now is that service needed, and they who would read aright the lesson of H.P.B.’s life will give that service unstintingly, ungrudgingly, if need be to the bitter end.
(Lucifer, June 1891, pp. 299-302; In Memory of HPB, pp. 35-38)